


Autocracy

by AntiTerraFirma



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Dark, Drugs, Everyone in this story is a bastard, F/M, More like Fallout 1 & 2, Nation Building, Power Dynamics, Psychological Trauma, Psychosis, Rebuilding, References to Depression, References to Drugs, Torture, Traveling, references to slavery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-16
Updated: 2019-03-16
Packaged: 2019-11-19 02:02:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18129497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AntiTerraFirma/pseuds/AntiTerraFirma
Summary: Nate's battle with Kellog was won, barely, and as he was dragged back by Curie and Nick to his bead in Sanctuary, his stubborn refusal of most meds, and his already depleted supply of stimpacks, nearly cost him his life. As Curie nurses him back from the edge, she curses the irrationality of the pre-war solider. Meanwhile, Hancock steps out for a smoke, when he spots a woman running down from the hill near the vault. He stood there - eyes narrowing at what shouldn't be possible. The Commonwealth had gained a new member yet again... But what would this one bring?





	Autocracy

**Author's Note:**

> * WARNING * : This story will be my first attempt at a truly, very dark, 'make your skin crawl' type of story. I want it to feel like Fallout 1, 2 and NV but with HD graphics. There will be slurs. There will be torture. There will be evil shit. I will of course put warnings at the beginning of each chapter... Wish me luck! 
> 
> Additionally, I altered the original look of Nate and Nora for... well... funsies I guess? Thought it might add a bit of something something. Let me know your thoughts when you can! Let me know if not dark enough as well, ha!
> 
> Warning: Slight slur against homosexuality.

* * *

 

I watched as my wife stepped in front of the mirror, grinning. “My husband is as handsome as when we first married.” I had just finished trimming my beard, noticing that though the black curls a nice complement to my darker skin, they were getting far too scruffy for my tastes.

“Damn right I am, honey.”

Hearing my wife chuckle as she put on her makeup, I walked into my boy’s room. He gurgled in his crib as I picked him up. The weight of him felt familiar and comforting; after a difficult pregnancy, I was glad to have both him and my wife home and safe. His mulatto skin reflected the mix of my wife and I’s genes, and with fatherly pride filling me, I was happy to see that my boy inherited both my eyes and nose.

“Sir! I have your coffee made!” My personal robot butler called out to me, and I put my boy down and went to enjoy my drink. My wife sat on the couch and smiled, an arm slung over the back of it.

“Nate, honey, come sit with me. I want to relax with you.” I happily obliged, only half paying attention to the newscaster as he droned on about the weather. I wrapped a near white curl around my finger, my wife’s hair always perfectly in place.

“You are so beautiful Nora…”

“Careful what you say. This morning has been so perfect…”  The couch squeaked as she curled up next to me, nuzzling in the crook of my shoulder. “If things keep going like this, I’m afraid something bad might happen.”

Suddenly, my heart began to jackhammer as the salesman’s knocks at the door reached my ears. I felt more than saw the fiery blast as the force of the nuclear detonation raced towards my home. The last thing I saw were my wife's eyes as she was blasted out of my hands, and knocked into the far wall behind us. My world went black.

I woke up gasping for breath, my side of the bed soaked in sweat.

“Nate dear, are you okay?” I felt a cloth on my forehead and I closed my eyes to the darkened room around me.  I hated how the morning light was able to filter through the roof my old room.

“Thank you Curie. You are my lifesaver.” I grabbed her hand as she put it near my face, my hand contrasting with hers beautifully.

“Literally in this case I should say, non? You must really be more careful out there!” I could hear her french accent thickening as she laid her hand on the bandages around my lower torso. “Your wound can only fight infection so much as well if you don’t drink. Doctor’s orders.”  
I sighed as my head hit the pillow. “It was just the last bullet fired! Fuck me, why is it causing so much trouble?!”

“You know why. You are the one who refused antibiotics in the beginning, when I told you it was becoming infected!” I tried to pull her too me, in an effort to kiss her and stop the tirade I knew was well deserved. But she pulled back. “Non, I will not kiss you if you do not listen to me.”  
“Curie, please darling -”

I heard a gravelly voice at my doorway. “Hah, brother you know that’s not how ladies work. You don’t pretend to listen, you lose out on the lovin’. “

“Shut up Hancock.”

He laughed, black eyes dancing with mirth as he went and leaned against the far wall, opposite my bed. “Too bad man, I have a lot to tell you now that you are back in Sanctuary. First, I’ve brought a couple of traders with me, and one of their supplies has something that will cure that little cold you got there.”

“Thank God.” I sat up on my elbows, despite the dizziness and looked at my friend. “What else is there?”

“You lied to me brother, how could you?” Hancock’s tone was playful, so I didn’t pay his accusations any mind.

“What do you mean?”  
“You weren’t the only one to get outta that vault. Woman just came out - smokin curves. Real thick thighs and… well... You agree Curie?”

“Not sure what you mean by smoking, as she was not on fire. But there was a woman. Off white hair and blue eyes. Seems to me a form of Albinism. I have only heard of this in Dr.Holland’s records of pre-war humanity ,”

“What?”

Hancock smiled as he took out a cigarette. Lighting it he smiled. “ No clue what that is, but can we go back to those curves? She definitely looks pre-war plump. Ran into me man, and the feel was great, lemme tell ya - right before she screamed and passed out in a ball of tears and fear, naturally.”

A pit was forming in my stomach. “Where is she?”

“She’s in one of the beds in the barracks next door. She wasn’t as lightweight as I’d hoped, but nothing a little buffout couldn’t fix. Don’t see that in the wasteland anymore, do ya?” Hancock chuckled as he flicked some ashes onto my floor. I glared at him for that.

I shook my head as I tried to sit up, nearly throwing up on my boots that had been placed at the side of the bed. “Non! Nate, don’t. You are not well enough. Your fever is too high! I just cured your septicemia!” Curie’s dark brown hair fell around her face as her eyes filled with worry.  “Do not panic, we have Dogmeat watching over her. _He_ will hopefully not scare her when she wakes up. Then we can ask her who she is!”

I looked at Curie and a slight feeling of guilt wormed its way into my chest. “No worries babe - I'm not a fucking pansy-ass. Don't even know what that fancy word is anyway. Besides, I think I know who the woman might be. I have to go and see it for myself.”

 

* * *

 

I opened my eyes slowly and with a lot of resistance, the sounds of small crunching noises crackling in my ears as I moved. The same noise that sounds when a layer of thin ice breaks. The cold air that filled my lungs hurt like hell as my nails scraped at the edges of the pod around me. I began to panic, scrambling for purchase. The ice was so slippery, I bent a couple of nails backwards when I finally flung my body out of the pod and onto my knees.

I breathed deep and enjoyed the free air. Then I noticed how stale it really was, as if there had been no movement here for a long time.

The pod across from me was open already, and empty as well. That was where my husband had been placed... He must have already escaped this vault! If I could just... wait...

My husband?

My... baby?`

Where was my baby? Where was _anyone_?!

“Hello? Hello!” Nothing.

Where my baby... was what was his name... what was _my_ name?

Why couldn’t I remember?

I pushed myself to one knee then slowly pushed on that to stand up. I walked forward and save the powered up terminal tucked away at my left.

My Joints refused to move as fast as before, no doubt due to the icy cold that had been surrounding them. _Lack of blood flow will do that to you..._

 _Nora... My name is Nora._ There was a piercing throb on the right side of my chest at this, and I reached up and felt what seemed like a scar on it through the vault suit. It felt sore, raised and I could feel the metal wiring of stitches cris-crossing their way across my skin.

_What happened to me? Did Vault-Tec experiment on me?_

I leaned on the terminal keyboard to catch my breath and was shocked when it snapped off and went tumbling. I fell to my knees, the broken keyboard clattering off to the side.

Panicking again, I took a second to collect my thoughts.

My name was Nora.

I had a husband. His name was Nate.

We had a baby... a baby boy named Sean. What happened to the baby – what happened to -?

I began to cry as I remembered pain as strangers tried to pull Sean from my grip. I remembered as the pain as a bullet tore through my lung. I remember gurgling on blood as I mouthed Sean’s name. I remember the cold quickly freezing the blood pulsing out of my wound.

I gasped out a sob as I remembered the struggle I had to conceive, the struggle I had during childbirth, and the struggle I had to hold onto him at the end. I had seen Nate watching me from the other side of the room banging on the glass of his pod in a futile effort to reach his family. I couldn't have let the love of my life down by giving up our baby – I had to hold on! I didn't even notice the other man and his gun until...

I felt like dry heaving, but I clamped down on whatever muscles I could to keep me from vomiting, I pushed myself up and out of the vault, wondering all the while what Nate and I had done to deserve this.

I saw the malfunctioning door and heaved a frustrated sigh, opening the door to another antechamber. I stopped dead.

Walking through, I finally took the time to look at all the faces that were alive and well only ... what seemed like five minutes ago. It was by far _the worst_ graveyard I've ever walked through.

I looked at the horrified face of Mrs. Palmer. She had just gotten home after chaperoning her daughter’s Halloween parade. And young Josie, she was only sixteen; a wave of guilt came over me as I had never finished paying her that extra bit for babysitting Sean so well. The neighbors were hard to distinguish really, as the inside of the glass coffins had a lot of blood on them, obscuring some of their faces.

On the terminal there, I found out why. Everyone had life support cut off and had suffocated. They must have tried to punch or claw at the glass to get out.

A morbid thought ran through my head: _I wonder how long it took for them to realize they were going to die._  

My hands began to shake as I could nearly hear the screams of the damned in my skull. It was then that I noticed my wedding band was missing.

_Did I lose it? Damn! Nate will understand though I'm sure._

I nearly crumpled at the thought of my missing husband... I needed him so badly - I was so scared. My expertise in law meant nothing against the flickering lights and dirty vault walls. It meant nothing here among the dead.

My legs finally did give out and I fell to the ground and hugged my knees. I bawled like a child. After what seemed like only ten minutes, but was no doubt a lot longer, I struggled to my feet. I couldn't stay here, if nothing else, my family needed me.

I made my way past the stench of rotting bugs, the sight of the giant roaches melting into the floor as their bodies decayed finally made me lose my lunch. I worked my way around the fairly small area of the vault and found the entrance. It was already opened, and I gladly ran out, only to find the elevator already up.

I screamed. This hole would _not_ be my grave! I went to the yellow panel near the opening, purposefully stepping over skeletons on my way. _Were they the doctors and security? Must have been…_ The little window over the big red button was open and I slammed my fist on it. Shocked to my core that it was functioning, I began to hear the elevator grind it’s way down to me…

The wait was slow, agonizing, and the cold seeped into me from the damp cold vault. The tremors in my body would most likely never cease….

I cried as the elevator took me up, seeing the light of the surface - as if I were on my way to heaven. As soon as my eyes adjusted to the light of the outside, I learned just what Hell looked like. I looked out over to Sanctuary, where my home was, and felt my heartbreak. How many times had Nate and I hiked up this hill, only to admire the home we had together, nestled below the foothills?

I hadn't felt this empty since... No this was more than emptiness... this was the black hole that all my hopes and dreams were sucked into...

Feeling sorry for myself, I encountered the skeleton of a soldier just outside the base, In a blue metal 'shack', and I realized that he was the one who saved me and my family. He must have been the one to hit the button in the final moments and send the elevator down... I wondered if he had died in the ensuing blast; the skeleton _did_ look twisted around. My heart clenched as this man saved my family and I, but he had no dog tags or name plate. How do you pay a debt to the dead with no name? His bones were bleached white, and his uniform was ripped and mangled as he was. A layer of dust and grime coated him and everything else in this place, picked clean no doubt in the aftermath of the great war. I turned and stumbled out of the building, only to have my vision swirl at the gate.

I saw the corpses... or rather bones of the neighbors that had closed their doors to the salesman trying to recruit for the vault. It killed me to think that had I not listened to Nate and answered the door, we all would have been one of them. Looking at the path home – _hah, home_ – I wondered if they were indeed the lucky ones. Radiation traveled at the speed of light and if that didn't kill them quickly, the blast wave would have killed them instantly. Not a one of them had been moved from the angles at which they died.

I could hardly see for the tears in my eyes, and scrambled along the dirt path, happy to breathe fresh air again. I ran, the tears getting worse as I noted the decayed state of... everything. I closed my eyes and ran, rounding the corner that I knew would take me to the street my house was on. I winded myself as I ran into someone, someone who smelled like dirt and gunpowder.

“Woah there sister, almost knocked me over with your run – are you crying? You look like you’re a Vaultie...” The voice was from a man, and was really gravelly. His hands were on my shoulders, comforting me rather than holding me hostage. This person was nice – they could tell me what happened...

I opened my eyes and screamed at the monster in front of me. I could feel my mind give up as I felt the blackness take me.

 

* * *

 

I stared down in horror at the dead woman in the bed, radioactive rain pouring down just outside. A bit was dripping just shy of the head of the bed due to the holes in the roof. It caused the smell of rotting wood to fill the air. Dogmeat had jumped up on the mattress, snuggling down behind her, head nestled in the hollow of her waist. Presumably this was to comfort her; though I don’t know why he’d comfort a synth.

My hands trembled, and I felt angry tears prick at my eyes. First my son is taken from me, now the institute has the gall to defile the memory of my dead wife?! I rub a hand across my scalp, a distant thought passing through my head that the curls had begun to grow again and that I needed to shave it.

I laughed, my breath becoming harder and harder to catch.

“Hey brother, you doin’ alright?” I heard Hancock behind me, leaning against a post as it creaked against his weight. I heard also the strike of a lighter. “You look like you need a light man.”

“Dammit Hancock you know I don’t do that shit!” My decibel raised a little, and so did Hancock’s eyebrows.

“What the hell is your issue brother? You know this chick?” Hancock flicked his ashes on the ground and I saw him turn his eyes to the sleeping woman. “Wait a minute…”  
I could feel the hair stand up on my arms as it dawned on Hancock what the situation was. The man wasn’t dumb, and it was only a matter of time before he took out an inhaler of jet and took a hit.

“Man Curie is going to be pissed. So this is your wife huh?”

“No!” I couldn’t stand the thought of this synth in my homestead, much less in my bed. It looked like my wife, but there was no way it could be. My memories of her felt absolutely desecrated. The institute may as well have butchered her body and put her head on a pike in front of the vault. My fists clenched. I hated those goddamn profligates with every fiber of my being.

I felt an obscene urge to grab it by the shoulders and throw her out onto the street. I stood there, staring at it, my traitor of a dog nestled into her and I finally gave in.

Reaching down, I grabbed her by the shoulders. “Wake up damn you! Who the hell are you?! Why did the institute copy my wife!?” Hancock reached out to me, no doubt concerned with my level of anger. I looked at him and shook my head. “Don’t worry man, I wont hurt her.”  _I think._ He nodded and pulled away. With a sigh, I saw her eyes flicker open and look at me - and the strangest thing happened.

“Nate? Oh Nate!” I remembered just what my wife was like. The only thing I could see for a moment was her. Happy, loving, stubborn as hell, and a wonderful mother. I felt my anger drain out of me as she wrapped her arms around me flung herself onto me. I fell backwards, much to Hancock’s surprise, and lowered my hands to catch myself. She kissed me, and I had the strangest urge to now throw Hancock out and kiss her. _Dammit!_ _Get a hold of yourself man!_

My emotions were spinning, right along with my head. I hated this thing that wore my wife’s face, but then again, it was nice just to hold her again… It wasn’t her… It wasn’t but…

“Nate I was so scared. I don’t know what happened. Do you know what happened to Sean? Where is our baby?”

I came to, letting the fantasy go, I lifted my - I  lifted the synth off of me and sat her on the bed. She refused to unwrap her arms around my neck however, and Hancock moved closer, kneeling down in front of her. The synth flinched at his proximity.

I felt even more that this could not be my wife - she was always so accepting, even of that dike couple down the way. It had to hurt my friend's ego, as his face tightened just ever so slightly.

“Hey sister… you need to let him go now…”

“My name is Nora. And why should I do that? He is my husba - wait…” She leaned back, finally extricating herself from my grip. “Why are you not holding on to me Nate?”

I could see in her face, the realization that she was not my wife flashed across her face. I could see the betrayal in her eyes, so I stared at a hole in the wood "wall" behind her. The grass was being soaked by the poison falling down, and I felt really bad that we were able to escape it inside the shack. For some reason I felt like taking a few rads.

“You… are… mad at me? What is going on? Why won't anyone tell me what’s going on?”

  
“The bombs dropped Nora!? Do you not remember the end of the world!?” I saw her flinch and her mouth open. I don’t know why I couldn’t seem to control the decibel of my voice.“You’re a synth anyway…” I stood. “Of course you wouldn’t remember.”

“You asshole, of course I remember! And what is a synth? Nate you’re freaking me out…” She looked around wildly at my silence. “What and where is this place?! And who are you?!”

I rolled my eyes at her, shaking my head. I knew it was rude but I couldn’t help but turn my back on her.

“Why did you yell at me Nate? Are you not happy to see me – I’m happy to see you…” I swallowed the guilt that made me want to apologize. This thing was manipulative and… I got control of myself. It was not her that was evil, it was the place that made her. I must remember that.

“A synth is a – oh for fucks sake!” I shook my head as she began to have tears roll down her cheeks again. She always _had been_ a crier; displays of weakness easily falling from her eyes.

 

 _A bird flying into the window and hurting itself_ – tears.

 _Sean crying for days at 3 A.M_ – tears.

 _Cogsworth paying her a genuine compliment_ – tears.

 

“The wasteland will destroy you… to be honest I don’t know why the institute made you as soft as before the war.”

“Dammit Nate I don’t know what the hell you are thinking! I am your wife – why don’t you believe me?! Is it because I lost my ring?” I panicked at that, as her ring was currently on Curie’s finger. Nora noticed my surprise and looked agape at me. No doubt she thought her missing ring was a big problem for me. I guess in a sense, it was.

“Hey, hey, sister – breathe… There you go.” I saw Hancock go from a standing position to kneeling in front of my wife, putting his hands beside her on the bed.

For some no doubt _idiotic reason,_ a pinprick of jealousy stirred in me, but I shook my head. There was no way I would allow myself to feel old feelings when this wasn’t my –

“So your name is Nora?” I saw him flash that “Hancock charisma” and was relieved that she began to relax. Less focus on me. Dogmeat also perked up from under the bed, no longer hiding from my angry outbursts. “The name’s Hancock.“

A weirdly annoying and breathy laugh from the synth. I could see her attempt to desperately smile at Hancock. “I thought you were a weird one, what with the tricorn hat – Turns out you’re just ...  _really ..._ bold, I think.”

“You got it sister.” I saw Hancock move one hand to Nora’s knee and again I marveled at just how _good_ the ghoul was at talking. He always was a better speaker. “Look, I’m going to level with you. The world here is – well it’s not the world you left behind… For starters, people with my kind of skin condition are what folks call ghouls.”

“Ghouls?”

“Yeah, also, when it comes to questions about ghouls, it’s best to come to me. Gotta keep those kinda questions on a low burner; lotta' ghouls are sensitive about their lot in life ya dig? Too much radiation – makes some people a little rough ‘round the edges.”

“Radiation did all this to you? Even your eyes…?”

“Yeah. I’m also a … special case in that too. Honestly, I think it gives me a ... sexy 'king of the zombies' look.” He tilted his head, and from where I stood, I saw Nora smile; I took it as my cue to leave. I turned on my heel, calling out to Hancock, “Hey man you’ve totally got this. I’ve got to talk to Curie.”

Hancock’s curse sounded from behind me. I may have left him to the wolves, but I needed to talk to the woman who wore my ring.

* * *

 _AN:_  
  
Ah the NV references. I do love the word profligate!

 **True to Caesar!**  
  
Is what a dirty legion boy would say!

 **But if I were a FrumentariI...**  
  
Is what an NCR SPY WOULD WANT YOU TO THINK!   
  
**Ave!**    
  
Just kidding. I see a red skirt, I shoot.

**Or do I?!**

No, kidding!  
  
:D  
  
Sorry about my exhaustion, heh, It's quite early!


End file.
